Secrets
by Zion Angel
Summary: Seven of Tony Stark's deepest, darkest secrets that only Pepper Potts knows. - Tony/Pepper-ish


Secrets

By ZionAngel

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Tony Stark wears makeup. Frequently. Only Pepper Potts knows this. For any party, any television appearance, even for some of the more important meetings he actually takes an interest in, he wears airbrush foundation, concealer and just a little bit of translucent powder to hide his little flaws, and he's an expert at applying it himself. He buys the makeup from a highly exclusive makeup artist who serves all the best celebrities in Los Angeles, and has been since he was twenty-three years old. Pepper knows this because she routinely stands close, to fix his tie or hair or whatever is needed before an important appearance, and drags him out of bed enough mornings to notice the faint color on his white pillowcase.

Tony Stark likes chick flicks. Girly movies. Only Pepper Potts knows this. When he's working in the basement and needs more than just music playing in the background, or on one of the few nights that he doesn't have female company - any company, for that matter - with him, he'll flip through channels or have Jarvis pick something from the movie collection. More often than not, the selection is sentimental, clichéd, romantic, and utterly lacking in action or explosions or any sort of macho thing. His favorite, she seems to have deduced, is _My Big Fat Greek Wedding_. Pepper knows this because she works late far too often, and has made it a habit to always tell Tony that she is leaving. She has walked in halfway through one of these movies many times.

Tony Stark's biggest fear is not living up to his father's legacy. His father's expectations and hopes. Only Pepper Potts knows this. Even though his father was only an average engineer and inventor compared to Tony, even though Tony created more devices and improvements in his first twelve months as CEO than his father did in twenty years, his greatest fear is disappointing his father. This fear is, to a great extent, what makes Tony push so hard to make everything just a little bit better. Pepper knows this because, every time he calls her down to the workshop and tells her to file for a new patent, he always glances at the picture on his desk, of his father and him when he was a little boy, as if he is seeking approval, and fears rejection. Pepper has not been able to work up the courage to tell Tony that his father would be proud, because she just isn't sure that he would believe her.

Tony Stark's favorite drink is not scotch. He prefers mixed cocktails. Only Pepper Potts knows this. It is the drink he normally chooses, though, almost without fail. Scotch was his father's favorite drink. Scotch is the drink Tony long ago came to associate with power, success, responsibility. So he drinks that when he's out, and usually saves the cocktails for nights at home, or quite dinners when there are no available women around. Pepper knows this because he told her, late one night in one of his few truly drunken stupors.

Tony Stark spends each anniversary of his parents' death cut off from the world so that he can get drunk in peace. He has not missed a year, not since he began the tradition at 18. Only Pepper Potts knows this. He goes to great pains to make himself scarce on that day, to arrange it so that he can be alone without anyone noticing, without putting the dates together. Some years he has left the country, or at least flown to New York. Some years he claims to be nearing a breakthrough, letting them all think he's busy designing Stark Industries' latest money-maker. Some years, if the thirteenth of December falls on a weekend, he simply stays home. Pepper knows this because during her first year working for him, that day fell on a Sunday. Ever the dutiful assistant, she came by the mansion to give him a contract she had forgotten the day before, and found him on the basement couch, two empty bottles of scotch, used tissues, and several old photo albums on the table in front of him, and dried tear tracks down his cheeks. She couldn't bring herself to leave when he yelled at her to go, and quickly gave up. She joined him on the couch, where he spent hours talking her through each photo in the albums in a slurred voice. That was the night he told her about the scotch. Some of the years since then - not all - he has asked for her company again, and she has given it.

Tony Stark can play the piano. The Baby Grand in his living room isn't just for show. Only Pepper Potts knows this. His mother was a famous concert pianist. Tony likes to say that he got two things from his mother: her mind, and her hands. She was a prodigy, and his genius came from her - not his father, like everyone assumes. She taught him to play since he was three years old, and he's good. He has always wondered if she wasn't disappointed that he didn't pursue music instead of engineering, but she never said a word, and always supported him. He didn't play as much during college, and not at all for almost three years after the accident. But when he finally began again, it was as if he never left. His favorite song is the theme from all those old Peanuts cartoons, the first song his mother taught him. Pepper knows this because she caught him playing at his penthouse in New York, where he keeps his mother's old piano. He told her the story, and played for her as she drank her morning coffee.

Tony Stark has a heart. True and kind and loving, and made of pure gold. Only Pepper Potts knows this. And that, she thinks, is a true tragedy. Because he does believe that what he is doing is right. He does want to save the world, despite what some in the media and the public think. And maybe she doesn't always agree with his methods, but she stands beside him, because she knows that his heart is in the right place. Pepper knows this because she has known the man for a very long time, and she knows she would not have fallen so deeply in love with anyone who did not have a heart as pure as Tony's.


End file.
